My baby story.

Today is supposed to be my EDD (Expected Due Date). If the count is right my baby should be delivered today. But he's already outside with me (!) and this is my 1st experience of giving birth to my baby boy 17 days ago.

7th June 2012- Thursday

Today is the day. Am i ready for this? The only question i have in my mind the whole journey from home to the hospital. After arriving at the hospital, i was admitted to a ward at 11.45 am. The ward consist of 4 patients and although im not ok with sharing room but, there's no single room available at the time. They promise to move me when there's any single room available. Hopefully by this evening.

12.18 pm

My OB (Dr Lily) came and induced me. The first ubat was given and it was really really hurt!!! ( ;'( ). I almost cried because of that. She said i am 1 cm dilated. I have to lie down for 1 hour after the induce- unfortunately at that time i felt like going to toilet to pee. What a suffer. Uhuk.

The thing with induce is, the effect will be seen and checked after 4 hours. If it opens for 3 cm, they will move me to labour room to give more ubat and deliver. Dengar macam senang je.

1.20 pm

The nurse came and checked the baby's heart beat and my contraction. Everything is normal Alhamdulillah- but i didnt feel any pain yet. I went to the toilet and right after that my family arrived. It was a very small space for my big family. They stopped for a while and went off to our apartment house to rest. I kept praying that they will move me to a single room so that the visitors (my family) will be more comfortable to visit. i was left with mak and my husband.

3.00 pm

I was moved to single room. Yeay. Comfortable and private. 

5.00 pm

Dr Lily came in. I was 2 cm dilated. And once again the medication was inserted into my vagina to speed up the dilation process. Once again it hurts me!!! I can see my husband's face changed when he sees me in agony. Seriously, i became so trauma everytime the door opens, afraid that the doc came to check me again.

Now is the second waiting game. I really want this to happen now. The pain started hitting me. It became stronger each time the clock ticked. A series of blood and yellowish mucus at about 9 pm and the contractions were stronger and longer. But that was it. It didnt really make me feel like pushing yet. Since i was admitted, i didnt know what to do, so i recited suratul Maryam, suratul Taubah and suratul Yasin; a few ayat that i already memorised from my reading to ease the pain and InsyaAllah makes the labour easy. 

My husband was with me all the time. i can see that he's also not comfortable with what is happening to me. The whole family and in-laws came and kind of camping in my room. i also realized that my milk is already coming out. Alhamdulillah. A good sign for my coming-soon baby.

10.30 pm

The pain subsided and completely stopped then. Perhaps the medication has lost its effect. I was able to sleep well that night. A part of me was relief because i was not ready to deliver yet. My body was exhausted and i dont think i might be able to make a big push that night. However, a part of me was quite frustrated. The pain really affected me but it still didnt happen. " Bila lagi...?"

8th June 2012- Friday

Mak said i was born on Friday. So maybe my baby will come out today. 

Another day started and im still in the same room, on the same bed still bloated with baby inside. Im praying hard that its happening today.

10.45 am

My OB came and inserted the medication for the third time. Like i said earlier, i was traumatic with the experience and it REALLY REALLY hurt!!! I felt like kicking the doctor right there and then. :'(. She said i was 2 cm dilated. Now i can really feel the pain. The contractions were stronger than everrrr!!!

12.45 pm

The pain subsided! Owh my. I felt really low this time. I dont want to be induced 4 times. Im already ready for this. i want it to happen. My husband soothing me and he said whenever this is going to happen, he will always be with me.

I lost track of time but it think it maybe 2 pm that i started to feel the intense pain. And the number on the contraction metre reached 99%. 

3.45 pm

Dr Lily came in and checked- i was 3 cm dilated. i was moved to the labour room and get ready for labour. I walked to the labour room because i want to. As i was inside, they put me in a room- with a drip on my hand. The drip consisted of medication and it will make the contractions became stronger and more intense. She also did a process called rupturing the membranes. They inserted a small, long plastic hooked instrument through the cervix to break the amniotic sac. This procedure called amniotomy causes not only discomfort, but pain too. This process alone enough to get my contractions going. 

Its expected that i will deliver in another 7 hours since im only 3 cm dilated and for first baby, the dilation will happen 1 hour per cm. i dont know whether i can last that long waiting since the pain really eat me up. The nurse checked me again at 5 pm, and she said im still 3 cm dilated. My heart dropped! At this time, she inserted her fingers through my cervix and manually moving her fingers inside and i was in pain like hell. My husband hold me tightly this time and he put the oxygen on my face to breath. i was feeling high with pain at this time. I hate that nurse! Seriously.

5.45 pm

The nurse injected me with something to release the pain. The injection makes me sleepy and she said its good for later, as i need the energy to push my baby later on. I was high with drug this time that im not really aware when my husband went off for maghrib prayer, my MIL, mok (grandmother), untie, my younger and elder sister took turn to come in and out of my room. They did everything they can to soothing me- massaged my lower back and somehow it ease the pain. 

I was asleep until 7 pm. When i woke up, another patient was brought in and shortly after that, she delivered her baby. I was so depressed. My husband was with me all the time. He was such my backbone since i cant really feel my bone at that time. 

7.00 pm - 9.00 pm

I cant describe the pain that i feel this time. Looking at the watch, and it didnt yet 11 or 12 oclock, i felt so stressed. My OB said the expected time for my delivery will be around that area, but i cant tahan anymore. I asked the nurse to check my dilation and she said 5 cm- meaning that i have to wait another 5 hours to push. Ya Allah, i cant do this anymore. The pain is killing me. at 9 pm, Dr Lily came in and said my dilation is already 8 cm- just 10 minutes after the nurse checked me. 

She asked me to baring mengiring and dont push yet. i have to wait for another 2 cm before i can push. i cant wait anymore. As i was lying down on my side, each contraction i felt, i push so hard to ease the pain. And i started feeling that my baby's head is coming down. i asked my mak to check but she said, nothing showed yet. The third time i push- sambil mengiring- i asked my husband to check and he said "dah nampak kepala baby!!!" 

And my OB and nurses came rushing to prepare for the delivery. When everything is ready, my OB instructed me to push.

" Ok. tarik nafas panjang-panjang, Bismillah then push kuat-kuat." This is what im waiting for all day long. So i pushed with all my might and boy, i felt so good. But i was stuck. My OB kept saying " pandai-pandai. Jangan stop, sambung push.."

I stopped and i felt that i lost my breath. The nurses, mak and husband asked me to tarik nafas once again and push. At this time i already realized how to 'sambung' the push. I took a deep breath, and push so hard. I can hear my husband was counting to my right ear- 1, 2, 3, 4 ... When i reached the end of my breath, i took a short breath to 'sambung' the push. And then i saw my baby came out- macam meluncur laju je on the bed.

Alhamdulillah. 

At 9.33 pm, Muizz Abyan was born.

Anyway, Muizz Abyan means " strengthen, honourable and eloquent".

He is indeed my strength. And no doubt he completes me, my life with my beloved husband.